


And I Wake Up Alone

by goth_on_ham



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst, Choking, Dubious Consent, First Time, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Oral Sex, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sex Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 12:40:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10764468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goth_on_ham/pseuds/goth_on_ham
Summary: Ed thought that throwing away the pills would be the end of it, but it wasn't. He is the Riddler now, but he still misses his old friend. His dealer offers him more, but Ed refuses. Instead, he decides he wants something else from this nervy little man who reminds him just a little bit of Oswald. Set post 3x15.





	And I Wake Up Alone

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a very nice fic at all and it's not going to be for everyone. 
> 
> I've seen and read quite a few fics that have Oswald sleeping with some other man as a replacement for either Jim or Ed, and I thought it would be interesting to have Ed do this. It turned out darker and differently than I originally intended, but I decided to post it anyway.

He was a poor substitute for Oswald, but he _was_ a substitute. 

Owen was a little less than ten years younger than Oswald but Ed would not have guessed that unless he’d asked him. He looked both older and younger than that at the same time. His long hooked nose was crooked from being broken and never set right. His eyes were pale, like Oswald’s, but they weren’t so brilliant, so bright. Perhaps they had been once, but drugs and drink and disappointment had dulled them. His skin was pallid and had a greenish hue to it. His face was marred with a mixture of pockmarks and freckles, and on the inside of his arms, there were deep red track marks.

However, despite all these imperfections, there was something about him that reminded Ed of Oswald. Perhaps it was the messy bird’s nest of black hair that sat on top of his head. Or how he acted like he could get the world in the palm of his hand if only he _tried_ but really, there was a deep seated nervousness to him. A secret insecurity.

Ed had thought that becoming the Riddler would be enough. He had thought that Oswald’s lingering presence had finally been washed away from him. The white capsules he had been taking for weeks to see him, to cling onto him for just a bit longer, had floated away from the docks and towards the sea. At that moment, he had thought he was finally free. 

It turned out, even after Oswald was gone, he still missed him. 

He still wanted him.

He had met Owen when he had first started taking the capsules and when he stopped, Owen turned up at his door and pestered him to buy more. He tried to sound intimidating, but when Ed said no for the third time, he fell to begging. 

“Please, man. Look, I’ll give you a discount. I just, I really need the money. Okay? Come on.” He shifted from foot to foot and looked up at Ed with his pale eyes all wet and misty. Ed had been about to say no again, and maybe even take out the switchblade hidden in his pocket to stop his whining for good, but then he saw that _look_ , and he didn’t.

“Come on, man. Say something.” Owen whined, resembling Oswald more than ever when he was close to tears.

“I don’t want any more of that stuff from you.” Ed tilted his chin up slightly, accentuating his superior height. He found that the whimper that his answer got out of the small, nervous drug dealer, made his heart thrum with power. “But there is something else you could do for me.”

Owen must have done it before, because he caught on quickly to what Ed meant. He didn’t even have time to think of a riddle for it.

The younger man got onto his knees and unzipped his fly, and within moments, Ed’s cock was in his hand, being stroked into hardness by Owen’s too-cold hands. 

Ed hadn’t quite expected so much enthusiasm and it wasn’t like it would have been with Oswald at all, so he told him to stop.

“You don’t like it?” Owen stopped as soon as he was told to, but he sounded disappointed.

Ed closed his eyes and sucked in air through his teeth. He didn’t dare speak until he’d collected himself together enough that his voice wouldn’t quiver.

“You seemed to be liking it just fine a second ago.”

There is was. The thinly veiled arrogance that Owen shared with Oswald. 

Ed snorted in amusement and gripped him by the hair, and was satisfied when he gasped. 

“Start again.” He ordered, and Owen did, but this time more slowly. Ed grunted and let his grip on his hair loosen until he was just stroking him, petting the black mess. Then, Owen’s head moved forwards suddenly, and he started to use his tongue on him. Long, lingering laps and then, overwhelming warmness and wetness that made Ed moan loudly and his knees grow weak all too quickly. 

He hadn’t even had time to think of Oswald before he’d come. 

“So you’ll give me the same money as before for that?” Owen wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, and Ed’s expression darkened at him for ruining the moment. Owen flinched and obediently quietened. However, he shifted on his knees impatiently, like he was still waiting for an answer.

After zipping himself back up, Ed finally replied. 

“Not quite. There’s one more thing I want to do to you.” It wasn’t really a request, because he knew that Owen wouldn’t say no. In fact, Owen didn’t say anything, he just frowned slightly in confusion. 

So Ed elaborated.

“My friend, he died before we ever… Well, you know.” 

“Before you ever fucked?” Owen asked, showing no clear emotion Ed’s words.

“Mmh, and before I can move on, I want to find out what it feels like.” Ed caught a brief flash of uncertainty cross over the young man’s pockmarked face, and he found that it was easy to imagine Oswald looking like that. On his knees, nervous, and unable to say no to him. However, he felt infinitely more affection towards Oswald than he did Owen, so he wouldn’t have been so cruel to him.

‘But you shot him.’ A voice inside of him said, an unwelcome reminder to why Oswald was gone to begin with. A reminder of why he was paying a junkie to suck him off and then bend over for him, rather than embracing the man he had come to realise that he’d loved.

“Give me an extra $50 and I’ll do it.”

Ed blinked, snapped out of his self pity by Owen’s agreement. He smiled more broadly than was decent and nodded. “Excellent.”

—

How would Oswald have acted? How would Oswald have felt? How would Oswald have sounded? 

Ed would never know. 

Owen wasn’t Oswald. Despite some superficial similarities, Ed began to realise more and more that he was _not_ the same in any meaningful way.

However, Ed would be lying if he said that he completely regretted paying the young man for sex. 

At first, when he was on all fours in front of him, it was easier to imagine Owen as Oswald. The two men had a similar build. Although Ed had never seen Oswald in such a position, he could picture Oswald more easily like this having seen Owen.

He ran his hands over Owen’s bare back, feeling him tremble and hearing his breath hitch. 

He was gentle at first, but then his hands wrapped around Owen’s bony hips and he held on tight enough to bruise. He didn’t bother with preparation, but with Oswald he would have, and as he pulled his ass down onto his cock Owen cried out sharply and swore. Then when Ed started to thrust, he started to moan, and Ed couldn’t tell how many of them genuine. 

“Fuck, man… That, ugh… A bit slower, okay?” Owen pleaded, his voice strained and his face pressed to his forearm. On their way to the bedroom, he had said that he’d done this before, lots of times, but judging by how tight he felt, Ed suspected he had been exaggerating. 

Ed relented, slowing, and Owen mumbled out a quiet ‘thank you’. It would have almost been cute if Ed wasn’t so keyed up.

“Don’t speak. You’re distracting me.” Ed grunted, ignoring the whine of protest as he gradually picked up the pace again. He could feel his pleasure building, coiling his insides tight and it made stopping feel impossible. He closed his eyes and thought of Oswald. He tried to picture him, tried to hear him, and his face formed a tight grimace when Owen’s moans and whimpers didn’t match how he thought Oswald would have sounded.

“Fuck…”

“I told you not to speak.” Ed hissed, and without thinking about it, he wrapped an arm around his throat from behind, pressing hard. Owen cried out again, louder, and reached up to try to get it off of him, but Ed pressed harder. Owen bucked against him, choking sounds spluttered out from his lips and his short but jagged nails scratched at Ed’s arm. 

Ed came while that was happening, and it was only when he had finished that he realised his arm was covered in blood. 

“You’re fucking sick!” Owen scrambled off the bed and began collecting up the pile of clothes that were on the floor. A dirty, dark blue t-shirt and grey slacks with a stain on one of its legs. Oswald would never have worn them. 

Ed supposed that he should really kill him. Letting him leave seemed like it might come back to haunt him someday.

But, he decided that he was okay with that. 

What was one more enemy when the whole city was out looking for him? 

Besides, he reminded him of Oswald… A little bit.


End file.
